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Billy Crystal

Monsters University (2013) vs. Monsters, Inc. (2001)

June 21, 2013 Eric Volkman 3

This Smack takes us far from the terror-tory of evil Godzilla, doing his best to annihilate Tokyo, or the mayhem wrought by the homicidal dinosaurs of the various Jurassic Parks. While monsters have been intimidating heavies in many of movieland’s most horrific films, that’s not the case with the lead characters in this pair of contestants, which feature bizarre, animated creatures as heroes and saviors in the twin Pixar offerings Monsters, Inc. and its new prequel, Monsters University. […]

Oscar Wrap-Up 2013

February 25, 2013 Arthur Tiersky 7

Two years ago, the Oscars crossed the line from Annual Guilty Pleasure into Annual Torturous Ritual, and by the look of things last night, that’s where it’s planting its feet. The main issue I raised […]

Title Fight Preview >> July 2012 >> Batman versus Spider-Man

February 27, 2012 Bryce Zabel 5

Initially, fans seem to be anxiously anticipating every frame of The Dark Knight Rises while lamenting the need for such a fast re-boot of The Amazing Spider-Man. But with every new trailer tease for Spidey it seems less-and-less like the Sam Raimi version, no matter how well-regarded, from 2002. Andrew Garfield, we think, will eventually be seen as a more faithful version of Peter Parker than Tobey Maguire ever was and that may make a big difference.

It’s probably a good bet that both films are going to be seen by almost everyone eventually but it may turn out that The Dark Knight Rises will be the one that gets the most “must-see-now” box office. […]

Oscars 2012: The Final Word

February 27, 2012 Arthur Tiersky 5

What can one say about such a non-event as the 2012 Oscars? Perhaps not quite that it was “The Most Boring Oscars Ever!!!!,” as Nikki Finke is apparently obligated to say about every Oscarcast. But […]

We’ve Pre-Smacked All the Oscar Noms Just for You!

February 22, 2012 Bryce Zabel 0

Because we are diligent culture-watchers operating here at The Smack, we come to this day well-prepared. We’ve had each of the nominated “Best Picture” films in the Smack ring already. Not all of the films below even won their Smacks, but we’re not telling which ones. 😉

This offers us the chance, here in this single post, to create a gateway for you to lots of fresh writing, keen observation and (of course) a general lack of respect for authority, cinematic or otherwise. It gives me a chance to brag about the talent of Art Tiersky, Eric Volkman, Nicole Marchesani, Mark Sanchez, Rebecca Coffindaffer and Ben Silverio; their work is all available below. The really great artwork below and above is all from Lynda Karr. […]

The Return of the Kings: Gervais-Crystal Smackdown

January 13, 2012 Bryce Zabel 0

In our Hollywood family, Billy Crystal, in contrast to Ricky Gervais, is the really funny older brother or family friend who tells great stories, knows a couple of magic tricks for the kids, can lead with “Happy Birthday” or “Hava Nagila” when called upon and, when the kids are out of earshot, is renowned for his annual telling of some off-color joke that is perfectly calibrated to shock but not really offend anyone. You know he won’t cross the line, really, because he’s a good guest — he’s come to the last eight dinners and each one was a warm memory, even if you can’t quite remember one from the other. They all kind of blend together but he’s so nice and, besides, he’ll show up even if you ask him late because that cute guy from the office can’t make it after all. He’s Jay Leno-safe, except that he can also sing and dance. […]

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