Movie Smackdown!®

The Dictator (2012) -vs- You Don’t Mess with the Zohan (2008)

Some movies take place in a world that we'll call “comedy reality.” This is clearly not the real world, nor is it quite the anarchic spoof world of, say, Airplane! or Scary Movie, but it's an unabashedly silly alternate reality — one in which a man can kick someone with both feet simultaneously, a fire can be doused with a hose full of hummus, and a cell phone can get left in a woman's womb as she gives birth. We come to you today from a different world, one of competitive film criticism, where two vaguely similar movies can wrestle each [more]

Dark Shadows (2012) -vs- Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

Can Barnabas suck the blood out of Buffy or can this tough vamp of a fighter slay the hell out of this unchained vampire? While that alone might be enough of a question to guide a Smackdown, this one gets complicated by history. Dark Shadows, as people over fifty know, began as TV then became a film. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, as people under thirty know, began as a film and became a TV series. The former, in theaters now, is a derivation of its former glory, while the latter is an inspired evolution of its big-screen [more]

The Avengers (2012) -vs- X-Men: First Class (2011)

If one superpowered superhero can fuel a super-blockbuster (Spider-Man, Hulk, Thor, Batman, Superman, Captain America), just imagine what a half-dozen of them in the same movie can do. A few years ago, Marvel Studios did just that. After giving movie-length origin stories to its key players, Marvel now brings all their power-hitters together into the ultimate superhero combo group — The Avengers. Imagine this group fighting not just evil but each other for screen time: Captain America, Thor, the Hulk, Iron Man and a couple of second tier-types, the token hottie, Black Widow, and Hawkeye, the guy with the bow and [more]

Awake (NBC) -vs- Fringe (Fox)

It’s the lucky ones among us who get the luxury of a “do over,” a chance to take the road less traveled. Poet Robert Frost isn’t the first person to actively wonder what lies on the other side of the life we’ve made. A pair of admired TV programs work that street of possibilities, although maybe not for long. Let’s touch on the newer and more endangered series first. NBC announced Awake as a mid-season replacement for 2012. This is a cop show with a twist that marks it as a fresh entry in a tired, overplayed genre. Propelled by advance [more]

The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012) -vs- Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)

Who needs humans for a Smackdown? In this bout, our contenders will be lumps of plasticine. England’s Aardman Animation has been entertaining audiences for years with its claymation shorts and feature films showcasing the studio’s fresh, imaginative brand of stop-motion animated comedy. Its most recent offering Pirates! Band of Misfits is a typically off-kilter, spoofish take on pirate movies, featuring an underachieving crew of buccaneers caught up in adventures at sea and [more]

The Five-Year Engagement (2012) -vs- Runaway Bride (1999)

Spring is a time of rebirth and new life, and what institution better embodies a new life than marriage? Well, probably divorce. Either way, spring is in the air here at Movie Smackdown, and we’ve got a major matrimony matchup to do battle—without even the benefit of a pre-nup. The Challenger in this rom-com rampage is The Five-Year Engagement, premiering this weekend, with Jason Segel and Emily Blunt as the [more]

Behind the Velvet Curtain at the Newport Beach Film Festival

The wide world of film festivals isn’t something a lot of people really know about unless they’ve gotten an up-close and personal introduction. I got mine during my last year of film school. See, I was background talent for a friend’s studio shoot when I met this guy who worked with the Newport Beach Film Festival and swore he could get us internships there. Taking him at his word, I drove out to the festival office, put in an application and was thrust into a world which has been a huge part of my life ever [more]

The Avengers — Day One

The Avengers will start raking in euros and shekels this coming week, as it rolls out in dozens of countries across the globe before it hits U.S. screens May 4. This is an affront to American culture so serious, we fear it could unleash the apocalyptic menace of Loki on Marvel Studios, which produced the film, and Walt Disney Pictures, which is distributing it. Luckily, Movie Smackdown is on the case with a collection of SmackTalk Comix, The Avengers: Day One, designed to tide over American audiences, while helping Hollywood insiders avert the pain of Thor’s hammer. We’ve crafted this [more]

The Three Stooges (2012) -vs- Dumb & Dumber (1994)

As a couple of neophyte writer-directors, Peter and Bobby Farrelly began their careers with a broad slapstick comedy about two morons. Now, almost two decades later, the hugely successful sibling filmmakers have gone on to make a broad slapstick comedy about three morons. Thus, one can view their latest offering, The Three Stooges, as a return to their roots, a loving tribute to the immortal trio and the classic shorts that shaped their comedic sensibilities and served as inspiration for their Dumb & Dumber (1994) and practically everything that followed [more]

American Reunion (2012) -vs- American Pie (1999)

In this matchup, the Movie Smackdown Arena has been converted into something that resembles the Iron Chefs’ Kitchen Stadium because we’re comparing an American culinary classic: Apple pie. Everyone loves a slice of warm, homemade apple pie, but which one is the best piece: the first or the last? If you ask Jim Levenstein, I think he’d say to just jump in headfirst and enjoy, but I wouldn’t recommend using the head that he [more]

Title Fight, July 2012: Batman versus Spider-Man @ The Smack

You know it's coming — a super heavyweight championship — and it's on for this summer. Make your bets now in the mega-Smackdown between the SONY 3D re-boot of The Amazing Spider-Man (July 3) and the third and final installment of Warner Bros. The Dark Knight Rises (July 20). These two awesome franchises — both successful at the box office as well as critically — mean to fight it out in the cool air-conditioned theaters of our globally warmed summer. Expectations for each are as high as they can get, particularly for the new Batman film but, increasingly, for the new [more]

Mirror Mirror (2012) -vs- Ever After: A Cinderella Story (1998)

Which is the fairest movie review site of them all? We at Movie Smackdown like to think it’s ours, and to further our conviction, we’re bringing you a contest between two modern live-action versions of classic fairy tales. Mirror Mirror is a light-hearted adaptation of the Snow White story, with Julia Roberts as the evil Queen making a concentrated attempt to keep the pretty Snow (Lily Collins) a virtual prisoner in her family’s castle. [more]